Hurt

i didnt go bac again tis week..
dear going to sit for his mid-term tomorrow..
i have my own stuff to do tomorrow too...

currently having a very down mood..
as what i said in fb..yes..i am jealous the relationship they having now..they need frens..so do i..i knew that they dislike me..i have been selfish before..didnt she..?
what had i did wrongly..?
i do not know..
i miss those time..but i know it is a impossible for me to have those time again..
tears is in my eyes..i can feel the feeling of heartache..
i do not wish to cry in front of him..but i cant control myself..
i am so down now..i think no one can understand me unless they experienced it before..

i knew they have comment about me..for sure..as we always comment about people..arent..?
my situation is just like i dun have fren anymore..how sad...
people always complaint how unlucky they are..included me..
i always think about..why they can have both happiness..?
why people can drive so expensive car..but i dun even have a bicycle..
i know my family is not poor but is not rich as well..
i dun dare to demand a car from my dad..my dad might affordable to buy me a little car like viva..?
i know as a student shouldnt demand so much..i can have all the needs is more than enough..
i always think that how good if i have a car..i can go anywhere..
but when i saw some people walking bac from campus to their hostel..i know i shouldnt think that much..
i feel guilty when i see them walking..as i still have car to sit..although it is not mine..
so i do appreciate every time when dear fetch me to campus..
i complaint so much every time..i know they are people who are 1000 times unlucky than me..but still i do complaint sometimes..
and the thing i need is just frenship..
maybe my personality is very bad...?people dislike me so much..?
maybe i need to self-questioning..?
yea..maybe..

i am so so so so so lucky to have him with me all the way..
♥Dear, i so appreciate u know..
although we do argue sometimes..
although i show my bad temper to you..
but really...whenever i think if without you..what my no-fren-life will be..?
do not dare to imagine..
♥Dear, thank you for everything..
many many things until i cant list out one by one..
Thank You is the only 2 words i can say my dear..
I love you..thanks for be with me..

feel better after bac from dinner..
hope i wont think about this problem again..everything just let it be..
or just accept the cruel truth..life is just like that..

tomorrow gonna take photo at beijing house..
hope the progress will be smooth from the beginning till the end..

last but not least, sorry if i did anything that had offended anyone of you before...

Live Happily Forever After...

p/s: i miss my parent♥♥♥